Is This Lie a Sin?

Three years ago, my favorite aunt died. Aunt Elinore died suddenly and unexpectedly. I still miss her. She only brought joy into my life. Only joy.

In a coordinated manner, her husband, my Uncle Earl, was my favorite uncle. He always had a smile on his face and a joke to tell. In contrast to the quick death of his wife, my Uncle Earl is dying a slow and painful death. Not for him, thankfully, but for the rest of us it is. He has memory loss, and whether you call it dementia, Alzheimer's, or just old age, it doesn't matter. It is slow and agonizing to those who love him much.

Uncle Earl thinks that Aunt Elinore is still with him. He is totally unable to get it into his mind that she is gone. He lives in the continual hope she is coming around the corner.

Their son, Earl Jr. (my cousin) had the sad duty to tell his dad, and my uncle cried long and hard the first time he heard the news. The next day, Uncle Earl had forgotten, and when Earl Jr. reminded him, he cried long and hard. Then came the next day, and you guessed it, my uncle cried long and hard at the news his wife had died.

Earl Jr. was in a spot no one wants to be in. Shall he speak only truth and watch his dad grieve anew every day? Or does he pretend his mom is still alive? Yikes! What a conundrum!

Compassionately, he chose the latter. His dad simply cannot get it. His mind is broken.

And as far as I can see, imperfect as it is, I believe my cousin is doing it right by lying to his father. Perhaps it is an adequate application of the biblical principle found in I Peter 4.8:

Love covers a multitude of sins.